December 2011
85 posts
4 tags
Not a Canada douche
What does the future have in store for this chick’s namesake?
By the way, keep sending in those pictures - we love em!
canadadouche@gmail.com
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Sub-Zero Canada Douche
Check out this holy-crap-this-freezer-is-like-sub-zero-cold-but-thank-god-I’m-wearing-my-Canada-Goose-jacket Canada douche. Bitch, you know you want to reach for the sale ice cream so just do it.
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Spoiled Canada Douche
Check out this my-daddy-bought-me-this-jacket-and-bag-and-even-like-my-hair-dye Canada douche. She’s so fucking artistic with the double take. COOL!
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On the Streets
Have you guys seen the Mini Eggs Canada Goose special edition?
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Chameleon Canada Douche
Check out this Canada douche intentional cleavage. Come on gang, we’re all thinking the same thing - she’s probably fat.
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Canada Douche Slut
Check out this Canada douche slut, if this is in fact a Canada Goose jacket. If not, she’s just a regular slut. Anyways, why not just get a job and save the money to get the jacket? Why stoop to prostitution?
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Drake is a Canada Douche
Check out this Canada douche insanity. So this is a collaborative jacket between Drake and Canada Goose and it’s called October’s Own or some gay shit like that.
First of all, October isn’t cold enough to wear a jacket like this.
Second of all, the designers were probably inspired by Baby Phat.
Third of all, the jacket is $5000!!! No place on Earth is cold enough to merit...
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when a group of friends wear Canada Goose...
They look like a flock of pigeons.
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Realistic Canada Douche
This is what you actually look like when you wear your Canada Goose jackets.
jeremytee asked: this blog is too fucking jokes
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Reader Submitted Douche, Mongkok
The one in the blue is their leader (or they were sold out of black when they went together to buy the jackets). I think it’s safe to assume that these guys spend way too much time with each other.
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Reader Submitted Douche
“Would it be totally laaaame if you took a picture of me right now?”
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Reader Submitted Douche
Check out this Christmas Canada douche. He could of at least moved the purses in the background.
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Reader Submitted Douche
Check out this Snooki Canada douche. Notice how everybody moves away from this Snookum. And what about that luggage? Not only are her colours douchery but so too is the fact that she takes up soooo much space carrying that pink abomination of a bag around. I bet there is a second Canada Goose jacket in that luggage.
The reader submitted this:
My friends and I like to call female douchebags...
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Children's Story Canada Douche
Check out these our-tags-read-like-a-children’s-story Canada douches. The tag for this picture on tumblr is:
#blue goose, #green goose, #drunk girls
What would their parents think?
4 tags
Rhetorical Canada Douche
Check out this rhetorical Canada douche. He probably forgot the question mark and since he feels like rewriting the English language, it reads, “Fresh who?!”
I still don’t get why people buy the vest.
zombivish asked: My GF has one. It's red. Her dad bought it for her b/c he thought it would be good to keep warm. He lived near the Arctic at the time (Pangnirtung to be precise). She only busts it when it's really cold because "it's like wearing a duvet. Still a douche?
6 tags
Commercial Equivalent to Canada Goose
If this guy had a Canada Goose jacket, it would be gold coloured.
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DESPERATE Canada Douche
Check out this so-desperate-I-need-to-type-in-caps-to-be-noticed Canada douche. He’s in desperate need of a Canada Goose but he is limited only to red (100% douche) or black? So if someone offers him a white, green, or blue he’ll turn it down? Someone text him or her with alternate colours and see how he or she replies. See, Canada Douche is uber interactive.
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Too Much Canada Douche
This Kijiji ad brings up a complex question: does the sale of his or her Canada Goose make him or her less of a Canada douche? Or does owning three seemingly similar jackets at one point in time make him or her a superlative Canada douche? Discuss via answers.
elyfantshoo asked: my cousin bought a Goose without the patch, does that make her less of a douche?
paul-newman-and-a-ride-home asked: Lol if you're coming to the conclusion that I'm a douche due to the fact that im buying one because I kicked calc's ass you're a complete moron because you must not read. I wrote that im also buying it because I'm always cold all winter long. And doing well in calc is a reason to award myself because I'm guaranteed my scholarship for next year now. Which means 4000...
3 tags
How to spot a Canada douche: tip 1
It may not be easy to spot a Canada douche. He or she may appear to lay low one day with their douchery and the next day their douchery is rampant. So in order to tell if your friends, family or colleagues are Canada douches, I’ve put together a few simple tips:
1) Check their cellphones: You’ll need to be discreet to do this, but ask them if you could check something on their phone...
jerrydingdong-deactivated201203 asked: You know that "hypebeast" you posted a picture of? His coin pouch is fake, that colourway does not exist. Therefore, his pretentious picture further degrades his self-image and raises his douche level to 10,000
paul-newman-and-a-ride-home asked: Lol no it won't. I'm getting one because I get extremely cold in winter & I can afford to pay the price without breaking my bank account. :) & HELL YES i deserve to reward myself for kicking calculas' ass :D
paul-newman-and-a-ride-home asked: Why do you dislike canada goose?
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Over sized Canada Douche
Check out this over sized Canada douche. When kids wear baggy clothes, it’s cute. It’s not cute when adults intentionally wear baggy clothes. Did this Canada douche buy the jacket big so she could wear so much crap underneath? Even with all the crap, it still looks too big! And aren’t her legs going to be cold? This is some perplexing shiiiiit!!!!
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Tampon Canada Douche
Check out this I-look-like-a-tampon-in-the-forest Canada douche. Looking at this picture is like trying to understand surrealism art. What the fuck is going on here?
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Narcissistic Canada Douche
Check out this narcissistic Canada douche.
1) Canada Goose Vest: Does this actually keep people warm or is it just the cheapest alternative to being part of the Canada Goose gang?
2) Louis Vuitton Change Pouch/Key Holder: Whooooa, watch out, he bought the cheapest piece of Louis Vuitton leather.
Thus, we’ve got an ultimate Canada douche.
**This Canada douche may be categorized as a...
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Potential Canada Douche
If you want to be a Canada douche, you must remember to wear contacts. Wearing glasses with Canada Goose is like wearing socks with sandals or wearing two golf shirts and flipping both collars.
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Ballin' Canada Douche
Check out this ballin’ Canada douche. Take note aspiring douches, he’s wearing basketball shorts with a winter jacket.
bbsu asked: what if my goose has no fur? does that make me less of a douche.
6 tags
Triple Points Canada Douche
Check out this triple-points Canada douche.
5 pts: The skull hat.
10 pts: Sigh, the sunglasses.
20 pts: In the original, she’s not wearing shoes at all. But of course she could pair this ensemble with Uggs, that is, loaves of bread.
As you can see, douchery is evident with the Ed Hardy hat, indoor shades and potentially wearing Uggs. Without these items, she’d look like just a...
aguys asked: LOL the pic of the guy in the grey goose in the washroom, that guy is sitting behind me right now in the library.
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Hyperbolic Canada Douche
Check out this hyperbolic Canada douche.
1) “… but the large jackets in the Japanese Collection look SPECTACULAR on me). That’s debatable.
2) !!!! Why all the exclamation marks?! Get this guy a grammar tutor because he is totally using the exclamation marks out of context. Example, “Do not be turned away by the size!” actually reads, ”DO NOT BE TURNED...
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Inconsiderate Canada douche
“This is a brand new, never worn, authentic women’s CANADA GOOSE Thompson winter jacket in black, size small. It was purchased from Holt Renfrew as an xmas gift but is too big for my wife, and comes with the original receipt and all tags still attached (however its past the deadline to return or exchange it, otherwise I wouldn’t be selling it, I’d simply return it. ...
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10 Signs you're a Canada douche
There is one thing that needs clarifying - not every person that owns a Canada Goose jacket is automatically a Canada douche. There are certain actions and signs that equal douchery. Below is a list of things that make you a Canada douche. 1) You get the bright coloured ones. Ask yourself this, would you ever buy anything else as bright as the jacket or are you getting those colours to “try...
4 tags
Canada Douche Dildo
Check out this Canada douche with his dildo.
6 tags
On the Streets - Finch Station
Check out this too-cool-for-society Canada douche. Why should he need to stand in line with the other, Canada Goose-less, peasants? He forms his own line.
(This is a reader submitted douche and the asian guys laughing on the left may suggest falsification. Planned douchery is a no no.)
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Reader Submitted Douche
Matt Le Mloya, you are a king among men.
Get at me for pics: Really? Does anyone actually need to know what this whack ass jacket looks like? It looks like a fookin’ ski patrol jacket.
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Celebrity Canada Douche
Check out this Canada douche affection.
1) I’m not sure if the girl is elated about Drake or the exclusivity of that Canada Goose jacket.
2) If Drake’s fur begins falling off, he could always replace it with some of his eyebrow.
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Not a canada douche
Come on, he narrated March of the Penguins.
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Canada Douche Central
York University’s Vari Hall, the epicentre of Canada douchery. A place where douches of all shapes, sizes and ethnicities confer about their douche activities.
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Reader Submitted Douche
Check out this crying-for-attention Canada douche.
Let’s break this one down:
1) He’s in the bathroom. I know some bathrooms could be cold but cold enough to merit wearing a jacket? You’re living in some impoverished conditions friendo.
2) His hand is in his pocket. You know when Mario Lopez does it on America’s Best Dance Crew, well if he can’t pull it off then...
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Reader Submitted Douche
Check out these superhero Canada douches. Either these girls think wearing Canada Goose jackets give them super powers or wearing Canada Goose makes you a ninja. Sigh.
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Reader Submitted Douche
Check out this disturbing Canada douche. Is there really no other way to show off you own a pair of Nudies and a Canada Goose jacket? Is this the only way?
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Reader Submitted Douche
Check out this repetitive Canada douche. If there is one thing Facebook has taught us, it’s that people are immediately judged by their profile pictures. Wearing the same article of clothing, in this case a douche, in more than one Facebook picture is a Facebook faux pas and it says a crucial thing about you… you need to buy a second jacket.
jerrydingdong-deactivated201203 asked: At Unionville, there are more geese shitting in our hallway and classrooms than on the field.
measures asked: I think it's rude to take other's people's pictures without permission and saying how douche they are. Yeah, it's kinda funny, but kinda offensive don't you think? You have one of my pictures of me posing indoors with my goose and hat. It was -1 degrees outside and I was getting ready to go out. Sure, it's funny but I'd rather have you guys ask me for permission...
jwaikiboi asked: apparently albert campbell has the most douches. there are even pink and yellow.
